Into the Blue...

Sorry there is no Jessica Alba (in a parka, through the whole fucking movie, that's why the grosses suck on it!) in this post.

A few days ago in a rage of boredom the likes of which she so often is held in the grips of, IvoryValentine sent me an email full of random images that popped up when she searched for the word "blue" in google. We came up with a word for what she was doing, but I have long since forgotten it. it may have been googling, like oogling but with g.

Alas, she still can't figure out how to post so I thought I would throw up these images, her captions, and captions of my own (oh yes, cos I am this bored right now). Enjoy...

IV: This might be a mop, but really that's just my best guess since the page wouldn't actually open. It still doesn't leave me very settled even in thinking it is a mop.
BEG: I think this looks like either a mop with some sort of bamboo spear handle, or possibly one of those strange sea creatures that washed up on Sri Lanka after Tsunami 2004. Either way, majorly creepifyin'

IV: never like the idea of bad seventies porn and I really don'tlike the idea of it when it's European...they're probably still watching this shit!
BEG: Red, Hot and EWWW. Blue Passion? No, not at all. 70's porn just turns me off, all that hair, come on ladies, SHAVE already!

IV: Originally I thought this was some kind of moderntorture/sexual device or alternately a dolphin...as it turns out, it'sactually some kind of expensive silicone waterproof mitten. It scares me...imagine two by two with hands of blue with these.
BEG: I actually know what this is, it's called the "Orca" and it's a silicone oven mitt.
IV: ..."That's the last time we saw Rob before he hung himself from that very pipe." his uncle said.
BEG: New Chicken Wire for ceiling: $1.59/yard, Wire cutters: $12.99, Yellow and suede gloves: $6.99. Catching someone on film making stinky face before being electrocuted = priceless. He should be wearing the Orca mitts for electrocution protection.

IV: I think this might be a panties, but again the site wouldn't play nice and open. If they are panties, I have to imagine they are notvery comfortable.
BEG: This reminds me of one of those wierd Amish ring game things where you have to figure out how to disconnect the rings from each other, only with the crushed blue velvet it makes me think of Amish strippers using this as a ploy to get lap-dances.

IV: I actually thought this was underwear. As it turns out...it is not.
BEG: I think it's a boxing thing, but I like the idea of it being wierd blue snakeskin Sumo Wrestler undies.

IV: This probably doesn't bother you, but I just don't even have the words.
BEG: If it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't of spent that year in college. ::gesturing wildly like Lewis Black::

IV: This is a faux cunning hat...just sad.
BEG: Lame, the hat they call Lame!!!

**All of these photos were used without permission, but we aren't making money off of them or ridiculing the photographers, so I don't see why anyone would care. Does anyone even look at this site or read it anyways? I think not. So Simma Down Now!